How You Dance Matters

The drive to realize our potential, push boundaries, conquer the unknown, and possess more is deeply human. This same impulse has fueled extraordinary achievements—but also profound abuses. Our society is marked by extremes: unrestrained personal freedom, selfish individualism, ruthless capitalism, militant feminism, ultraconservatism, neoliberalism, religious fundamentalism, terrorism, radical technologies, monopolistic practices, lavish lifestyles, violent entertainment and sports, financial fraud, the gun lobby, reckless spending, over-taxation, environmental depletion, and man-made climate change.

Such excesses do not foster a cohesive or harmonious society. Instead, they breed conflict, inequality, division, hostility, and war. We swing from one extreme to another, failing to see that all forms of extremism stem from the same core flaws: greed, selfishness, ignorance, intolerance, and aggression. We are unwilling—or unable—to consider perspectives beyond our own. We lose sight of the broader context, forgetting that each individual is but a tiny dot in the grand mosaic. In our reliance on power and dominance, we ignore the consequences of imbalance. This relentless pursuit of self-interest will only escalate social conflicts, eventually leading to the collapse of civilization. This is not alarmism. Given the radical and rapid transformations since World War II, how much longer can Mother Nature endure our excesses? How much longer can humanity preserve peace?

I am not alone in these concerns. Whether consciously or not, the enduring appeal of tango reflects a deep nostalgia for lost humanity—a quiet rebellion against the dehumanizing forces of modern life. Tango captivates because it offers an alternative reality—one of connection, togetherness, interdependence, fraternity, and shared purpose. It revives the joy of supporting, comforting, and sharing, rather than competing and clashing. In tango, we find a refuge from animosity, a shoulder to lean on, a language of communication, cooperation, reconciliation, and compromise. Within its embrace, we rediscover the wisdom of Jesus, who preached love; Gandhi, who upheld nonviolence; Lao Tzu, who taught simplicity and harmony; and Confucius, who valued the Golden Mean. Tango embodies love, intimacy, equality, peace—and a vision of the world we yearn to build.

This is why tango draws so many into its embrace. And this is why it is heartbreaking to see tango distorted—reduced to spectacle, turned into a vehicle for ego, exploited for profit, or shaped by the demands of political correctness. These distortions strip tango of its soul and betray its ideals. They turn a dance that teaches love into one that feeds vanity, an art that uplifts humanity into one that diminishes it, a symbol of the world we aspire to build into a mirror of the very world we wish to transcend.

Just as more people now recognize the urgency of protecting our planet—our only home—we must also take responsibility for nurturing a more compassionate and harmonious human world. Those new to tango must understand that how they perceive it shapes how they learn and dance it. One can approach tango as mere entertainment, or as a dance that nurtures love. One can focus only on steps, or strive to connect deeply with another. One can dance to showcase ego, or to express care. One can seek to reinvent tango, or allow tango to transform them—and through that transformation, help transform the world.

How we dance matters. It leaves an impact, one way or another. (See Beauty Will Save the World.)

The Alienation of Tango

Tango faces profound challenges in the liberal West. In a way, it has become a self-inflicted dance. Its steps do not have fixed configurations, and its music invites interpretation, granting dancers the freedom to improvise and create. Yet this untrammeled nature has led to sweeping transformations—especially now, as free-spirited foreigners pour in, bring with them a flood of exotic influences.

As with anything, there are always those who take it to the extreme—and tango is no exception. While we naturally crave freedom, unbridled freedom often turns against itself. Our ancestors understood this paradox, which is why they established checks and balances and the rule of law. Tango, outside of Argentina, however, remains uncharted territory—a wild frontier where dancers do as they please. Some have replaced the tango embrace with open holds, swapped classic tango music for alternative tracks, redefined gender roles, and introduced elements foreign to tango such as underarm turns, high kicks, and body lifts. Now you visit milongas in the U.S., you often hear exotic music and see dancers of all stripes moving in unrecognizable ways. It is still called tango, but the essence of the dance has been altered. There is little resemblance to the tango danced in Buenos Aires’ milongas.

Tango is a free dance, but it is not a “do-whatever-you-want” dance. It has distinct characteristics. For example, it is a close-embrace dance. Breaking that connection and distancing partners is not tango (see The Fourteenth Pitfall of a Tanguera). Tango is an intimate, emotional, and soulful dance. In fact, tango is more about feelings than steps. No matter how many new steps people try to create, without feelings it is not tango (see Tango Is a Feeling). Tango is a heterosexual dance danced by a man and a woman, allowing his masculinity and her femininity to glitter in each other's company (see Tango and Gender Interdependence). The man is the leader who plots the dance and shines the woman. The woman is the follower who surrenders to the man, synchronizes her movements with his and beautifies the dance. Refusing to surrender, reversing roles, or forming same-sex partnership undermines the very foundation of tango (see The Gender Roles in Tango). Tango is danced to the sentimental music specifically created for the dance. Foreigners often don't realize that the magic of tango lies in its music, which connects the dancers, stirs up their nostalgic feelings, resonates with them, inspires their creativity, and enables them to fully showcase their beauty. Changing tango music to outlandish tunes, the dance ceases to be tango (see The Signature of Tango).

No one can stop the evolution of a dance that embraces free expression. Time alone will reveal which changes endure. Tango has undergone this trial for 150 years. Whatever innovations people attempt today have likely been tried by others before—and most did not survive. The current form of tango—including its music, embrace, steps, and protocols as practiced in Buenos Aires—is the survivors of fitness among zillions of attempts to alter the dance along its history. Tango will continue to evolve, of course, but it will evolve in the same direction that made it tango. Any attempt to remake tango into a different or hybrid form is doomed to fail. If not so, tango would have stopped being the tango danced in Buenos Aires today long ago.