Tango is not only a fascinating dance but also a fascinating philosophy, culture and lifestyle. The search of tango is the search of connection, love, fellowship, unity, harmony and beauty, i.e., an idealism that is not consistent with the dehumanizing reality of the modern world. The world divides us into individuals, but tango unites us into a team. In tango we are not individualists, feminists, nationalists, Democrats, Republicans, etc., but interconnected and interdependent members of the human family. Tango calls us to tear down the walls, to build bridges, and to regain humanity through altruism, connection, cooperation, accommodation, and compromise. It is a dance that teaches the world to love.



February 5, 2025

Beauty Will Save the World


Tango is a beautiful dance. Those who are drawn to tango are captivated by both the elegant movements and the inner beauty that the dance represents. By learning tango, dancers cultivate their taste and improve their manners, making sure their performances exude refinement and sophistication. Through this pursuit of perfection, tango dancers add beauty to themselves, their lives, and the world around them, creating an atmosphere where art and elegance truly shine.

However, despite this dedication to beauty, there is often a paradox within the tango community. Many dancers, while graceful on the dance floor, sometimes show less flattering sides of human nature in their interactions with others. Indifference, unfriendliness, arrogance, and a tendency to show off are not uncommon. Some may even go out of their way to squeeze out competitions. These behaviors stand in stark contrast to the elegance and harmony that tango embodies, creating a dissonance between the beauty of the dance and the attitudes of its practitioners.

True beauty is not confined to the aesthetics of appearance; it is holistic and consistent. It encompasses the way we treat others, the kindness we show, and the respect we give to fellow dancers. It transcends the superficial and penetrates deeper into our character. A tango dancer who exudes elegance on the dance floor but treats others with disdain is not truly embodying the spirit of the dance. To be genuinely beautiful is to maintain consistency between one’s outward expression and inner values.

Dostoevsky once said, "Beauty will save the world." This profound statement speaks to the transformative power of beauty, not just in art but in life itself. The pursuit of beauty inspires individuals to combat all forms of ugliness - be it cruelty, arrogance, or indifference - and to strive for a better world. When we immerse ourselves in something as beautiful as tango, it should motivate us to carry that beauty beyond the dance floor, influencing how we engage with the world and the people in it.

As tango dancers, we have a unique opportunity to lead by example. By working on becoming better people, we can close the gap between the aesthetic beauty of the dance and the moral integrity of our humanity. This transformation starts with being self-aware and committing to align our behavior with the grace and elegance that tango stands for. When we show kindness, humility, and respect, we don’t just improve our own experience - we help create a more welcoming, beautiful community for everyone.

Ultimately, the beauty of tango is not just in the dance itself, but in the people who dance it. By striving to be better individuals, tango dancers can inspire others and help build a world that reflects the true essence of the art they love. The dance of beauty is not limited to what we do on the dance floor; it is a lifelong journey of becoming the best versions of ourselves.



January 14, 2025

Contra Body Movement in Dance


I didn't pay enough attention to contra body movement (CBM) until I saw the following video. Although this video is about ballroom dancing, I believe tango dancers will also benefit from it.




CBM is an essential concept in dance that refers to the action of turning one side of the body toward the opposite moving leg. For example, when the right leg moves forward, the left side of the body turns slightly toward it, and vice versa. This natural, counterbalancing action is not unique to dance - it is present in many everyday activities. When walking or running, for example, the slight rotation of the torso toward the forward-moving leg helps maintain stability and propels the body forward efficiently. Similarly, swimmers use CBM to create streamlined motion through the water, while cyclists rely on it to maintain equilibrium and power. These everyday examples demonstrate how CBM is deeply ingrained in human movement.

In ballroom dancing, CBM often refers specifically to shoulder movement, because the coordinated shoulder sway of the two dancers is a visual sign of their CBMs. Unlike in everyday activities, in dancing this shoulder movement is exaggerated to increase the artistry of the dance. The quality of the dance depends largely on the dancers' understanding of CBM and whether their shoulders spin consistently. When both partners maintain perfectly matched CBMs, their movements become balanced, coherent, and beautiful.

Similar situations also occur in tango when dancers execute movements that involve dissociation, such as turning around each other, walking alongside each other, zigzagging, changing position from one side of the partner to the other side, and much more. Dancers must keep their shoulders facing each other as parallel as possible in the dance no matter how complex the movements. Those who follow this rule perform much better than those who do not keep their shoulders parallel.




This coordination relies heavily on the suppleness and responsiveness of the dancers. Tension disrupts harmony. It acts as a barrier, halting energy rather than generating it. In contrast, movement is what truly creates energy. Dancers' suppleness and flexibility enable them to respond effortlessly to their partner’s movements, helping maintain natural flow. The secret to preserving harmony in motion is not resisting but “going with the flow.” A supple, flexible body - particularly in the upper structures - allows dancers to adapt to each other's movements without resistance. This adaptability plays a pivotal role in maintaining a harmonious connection between partners.

Therefore, dancers must find the balance between technical precision and responsiveness to their partner. Correct movements are not just about meeting technical standards; they are about creating a harmonious partnership that embodies perfect coordination between partners. The art of CBM is a vital skill that enables dancers to move as one. By mastering CBM and embracing suppleness, dancers can perform in harmony, coordinating their movements to increase artistry and create a much more visually captivating dance.





December 26, 2024

The Art of Balancing Reliance and Lightness in Tango


At the core of tango lies the natural bond and dynamic interplay between the opposite sexes that reflect their complementary qualities.

Men embody strength, while women exude a certain fragility. These differences create unique psychological needs. A man’s strength provides a woman with a sense of security, allowing her to relax and feel safe in his companionship. Conversely, a woman’s vulnerability and dependence fulfill a man’s innate desire to support and protect. This very human interaction is what makes tango so captivating. It combines the delicacy and dependence of women with the strength and responsibility of men, creating a harmonious complement that satisfies both. Women are drawn to tango because it allows them to feel connected, supported, and pampered, fulfilling their vulnerability and dependence in a secure way. Meanwhile, men are attracted to tango because it enables them to step into a role of strength and leadership. They find satisfaction in guiding, protecting, and responding to women’s needs and being rewarded by their femininity.

However, this balance can only be achieved when both partners understand their roles and work together (see The Gender Roles in Tango). Here’s the challenge: men enjoy women's attachment and dependence on them, but if a woman relies too much on a man, he may feel she is “heavy.” Conversely, if she is too independent, the connection and intimacy break down. Thus, it is crucial to find the right balance.

1. Trust Fully, but Stay Engaged
To satisfy a man’s desire to protect and feel needed, a woman must entrust herself to him. This means letting go of control, overcoming the urge to act independently, and surrendering to his lead. This trust allows the dance to flow seamlessly. But surrendering doesn’t mean becoming passive. A woman must stay engaged and responsive, meeting his strength with her own energy.

2. The 30/70 Rule: Dependence and Independence
A good rule of thumb for women in tango is to maintain 30% dependence and 70% independence. This balance ensures that your partner feels your trust and reliance without becoming overburdened. Occasionally, you can shift toward greater dependence, but always return to this foundational balance. If you are too dependent, he may feel as though he is carrying you. If you are too independent, he may feel as though he is not trusted (see Tango and Trust).

3. Interweave Dependence and Independence
Rather than adhering to a single mode of dancing, alternate between dependence and independence. Depend on him most of the time, then show a touch of your own initiative occasionally. This dynamic interplay of connection and momentary separation keeps the dance engaging and alive.

4. Be Self-Driven, but Subtle
Here’s a key skill: learn to activate your own movements while still following his lead. Stay light on your feet, maintain your balance, and push with your standing leg to power your movements. However, don’t let your partner feel you are driving yourself. Men enjoy feeling in charge, and if they sense you’re dancing independently, they may feel unneeded. The trick is to subtly support the movements without making it obvious. Think of it as adding your own energy to his lead, enhancing the connection without overshadowing it.

5. Make Him Feel Needed and Empowered
Ultimately, the goal is to make your partner feel strong, capable, and in control without overwhelming him. Show him that you trust and depend on him, but also that you’re light and self-sufficient. When you strike this balance, the dance becomes a true partnership, with both partners contributing to its magic.

Balancing reliance and lightness is no easy feat. It is a testament to a woman’s emotional intelligence, requiring awareness, sensitivity, refinement, and sophistication. But once you master this art, your tango will transform. You will experience a deeply connected, intimate, and satisfying dance. When you find the perfect balance between strength and vulnerability, dependence and independence, your tango will become one of the most fulfilling experiences (see Tango and Gender Interdependence).







November 29, 2024

Achieving Comfortable Arm and Hand Position in Close Embrace


In close embrace, the man's left elbow and the woman's right elbow are bent at approximately 75 degrees, allowing their hands to meet at shoulder height. The natural position of their hands has the palms facing their own body centers, with thumbs on top and little fingers on the bottom. However, this positioning prevents their hands from clasping properly - they need to face each other to interlock. Initially, both partners may adjust their hand positions to accommodate one another, but during dancing, men often unconsciously revert to facing their palms inward, causing the woman's hand to twist outward uncomfortably.

To prevent this issue, the man has to keep his palm facing the woman instead of toward his body center. He can also extend his left arm outward rather than keeping it raised in front of his shoulder - this naturally orients his palm toward the woman. Alternatively, the partners can avoid clasping hands altogether. The woman can instead place the lower part of her palm on his upturned palm, or let him hold the back of her hand. This eliminates any twisting or discomfort in her right hand.

The man should lead with his torso rather than relying on his arms and hands. He must keep his arms and hands completely relaxed to avoid unconsciously using them to guide movements. If the woman feels that her hand is being held too tightly, she should signal the man to adjust his grip rather than waiting until the dance is over to mention it. It’s normal for both partners to have some habits that the other finds uncomfortable. Communication is essential, and both partners should work together to adapt and accommodate each other during the dance.




Many women, especially those who haven't yet learned to relax, wrap their left arm around the man's right arm, not realizing that this puts pressure on his arm, restricting its movement and making him feel heavy and uncomfortable. This positioning also shifts their body to the right side of the man, reducing their sensitivity to subtle changes in his body position, which is one of the reasons women fail to do cruzada.

The right embrace is symmetrical, with the two partners face each other chest against chest. His left hand and her right hand hold at shoulder height, his right arm wraps around her body, and her left arm is hooked over his right shoulder, so the two are perfectly aligned. This correct embrace is not only the most intimate and comfortable for both partners, it also allows the woman to feel any subtle changes in the position of the man's body, so when he walks on her right, she will naturally reposition her body with the cruzada to put her body back in alignment with him (see Why Women Fail to Do Cruzada).

Tango, as an intimate, feeling-oriented dance, must be danced in the most comfortable embrace. Dancers should not just go with their own preferences and ignore the needs of their partner. A proper embrace, as described above, is one that feels right for both parties. Although this embrace may not be in line with someone's personal preference, dancers must accommodate each other, even put the other person's comfort first. Unfortunately, this perspective is often overlooked.



October 26, 2024

Reflections on My New Tango Home


Since moving to this city, I've been dancing at this particular milonga for about two years. The dance floor is a rectangular space, approximately 45 feet long and 30 feet wide. Typically, 40 to 50 people come here to dance, most of them seasoned tango dancers in their 50s and 60s, with a handful of younger or less-experienced participants. The gender ratio is about 27 men to 23 women, with men have the majority disadvantage. Interestingly, a couple of women prefer to lead, and most men tend to avoid dancing with these female leaders, adding to the shortage of followers.

The women here generally know cabeceo, though a few don’t, and these ladies receive fewer invitations as a result (see Women’s Role in Cabeceo). Except for a handful, most people dance in a traditional close embrace, and dancers with different styles rarely partner up. Overall, this milonga has a dance level that’s above average and I really like that, but the sense of community could be warmer. In individualistic America, this isn’t unusual. People come here to dance, not necessarily to form deep bonds. By contrast, in Argentina, people who dance together regularly will quickly form a close bond.

I dance with most of the women here regularly, though there are a few I’ve never danced with - not because I don’t want to, but because they haven’t shown any interest. My rule is simple: I only dance with women who are friendly and open to dancing with me. If someone never acknowledges me or avoids eye contact, I don’t ask them to dance. I’m not sure why these women seem so aloof. Is it that their standards are extremely high? Is it that they only dance with their regular partners? Is it that they think invition is men’s business? I prefer not to assume the worst because most people, I believe, are good people. The likely explanation is that they are socially inexperienced or lack cabeceo skills. But I have my principles, and I don't lack for partners, so I still haven’t danced with them (see Tango Etiquette: Eye Contact, Talking, Clique and Hierarchy).

There’s a big tango community in this city, and this milonga, with its seasoned dancers, often attracts visitors. However, these visitors rarely stay, perhaps due to the lack of a warm enough atmosphere I mentioned earlier. I’ve checked out a few other milongas in this city, and dancers there also tend not to dance with newcomers, so I didn’t stay either. It’s a common issue, and I think there could be improvements. Some possible solutions might include asking people to greet each other before the dance starts, adding some cabeceo education, encouraging everyone to dance at least once with someone they haven’t danced with before, and maybe requiring dancers to rotate partners during the first tanda after the break. These small changes could help break the ice and foster a more welcoming environment (see Tango Is a Fellowship).

To me, a good milonga needs three essentials: an amicable atmosphere, experienced dancers, and good music. There are a group of DJs playing music here, mostly classic tango hits from the Golden Age. Except for a few who have unique tastes that don't always match my preferences, most DJs keep a good balance in their selections. I’m generally satisfied with the music here, though the selection quality could still improve to make this milonga even better. It’s not about novelty; it’s about choosing tracks that are great to dance to. The more classic and familiar the music, the better - this is similar to playing the piano, where well-loved pieces often resonate best with the players and the audience. I don't understand why Pugliese is rarely played here. Considering that most people here are experienced dancers, adding more Pugliese might be a nice touch (see My Two Cents on Music Selection).