Tango is not only a fascinating dance but also a fascinating philosophy, culture and lifestyle. The search of tango is the search of connection, love, fellowship, unity, harmony and beauty, i.e., an idealism that is not consistent with the dehumanizing reality of the modern world. The world divides us into individuals, but tango unites us into a team, community and species. In tango we are not individualists, feminists, nationalists, Democrats, Republicans, etc., but interconnected and interdependent members of the human family. Tango calls us to tear down the walls, to build bridges, and to regain humanity through affinity, altruism, cooperation, and accommodation. It is a dance that teaches the world to love.



March 18, 2014

The Affinity and Harmony between Partners


Tango only happens when the two dancers are immersed in the music and find the connection between them. There cannot be tango between two beginners who don't listen to the music, are physically detached, emotionally disconnected and unable to communicate their feelings. (See Tango Is a Feeling.) They dance like two individuals bickering and disagreeing with each other. In contrast, mature dancers are fully connected. They immerse themselves in the music, which moves them, stirs their emotions, resonates with them, and enables them to find connections. As a result, they dance like two soulmates in perfect agreement. This agreement is what makes tango intoxicating.

What we are looking for in tango is the affinity and harmony between the dancers. A good tango partner doesn't have to be good-looking, but he/she must be a good match so dancing with them makes you feel the chemistry. Novice dancers tend to focus on superficial things like steps and impression. But such external things are unessential. What is essential is the dancer's inner quality: his masculinity, musicality, strength, leadership, protection, thoughtfulness and finesse; her femininity, lightness, flexibility, obedience, agreeableness, adaptability and coordination; and the connection and harmony between them. Those who pursue vanity and ignore the essence cannot find tango, just like they cannot find love. People often compare tango to love because the two share a common theme. (See A Dance that Teaches People to Love.) They both involve a relationship in which the two sexes play different roles but complement each other. They both aim at achieving oneness and harmony through commitment, submission, communication, understanding, cooperation and accommodation. A reader, after read my post The Gender Roles in Tango, remarked, "These seem to be applicable to real life relationships as well." Indeed, the concept of tango has a universal value. It reveals the way to achieve oneness and harmony in all kinds of relationships between individuals, genders, political parties and social groups, etc. (See The Lessons of Tango.)

Beginners need to turn their attention from the external to the internal. Instead of focusing on steps, they should focus on being one with each other. Concentrating on steps may cause them to ignore their partner, or blame their partner for not dancing well and want to correct him or her, resulting in incoordination. Focusing on being one with each other, on the other hand, will allow the dancer to work closely with the partner, or even be conceding enough to make the partner feel at home, so that the two may become one in the dance. Tango is like marriage. What makes it work is not pressing your partner to follow your will, but being cooperative and accommodating. Novice women often feel comfortable dancing with a milonguero, not because the novices know their stuff, but because the milonguero knows how to accommodate them. Surrendering, adapting to and being one with your partner, therefore, are more important than doing steps. (See Tango Is a Relationship.)



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