Tango is not only a fascinating dance but also a fascinating philosophy, culture and lifestyle. The search of tango is the search of connection, love, fellowship, unity, harmony and beauty, i.e., an idealism that is not consistent with the dehumanizing reality of the modern world. The world divides us into individuals, but tango unites us into a team, community and species. In tango we are not individualists, feminists, nationalists, Democrats, Republicans, etc., but interconnected and interdependent members of the human family. Tango calls us to tear down the walls, to build bridges, and to regain humanity through affinity, altruism, cooperation, and accommodation. It is a dance that teaches the world to love.



November 21, 2013

Tango and Gender Relations


Part One


A reader commented, "I have enjoyed reading your other thoughts so much, that I am very sad to read about your view of gender roles in tango. In my view, tango, as with any art, is a subjective and living thing. The ability to reassign roles to me is a progression. It affirms that the art can and does live and breathe in our contemporary world, which, for most of us anyway, rejects misogyny, rejects homophobia, and encourages empathy. The art will continue to be shaped by those who choose it and I agree completely that there is so much that can only be considered bastardization. But the exchanging of gender roles, the influence of LGBT, this represents the beauty of the art, not at all some kind of a decay. It shows that it lives in our time of changing gender roles and progress in human rights and understanding. And, in wonderful irony, reflects tango revisiting its roots." (See The Alienation of Tango)

I appreciate the comment but disagree with the commentator, and would like to explain my view on this issue more clearly because gender roles is among the most important issues in tango, in my opinion. Tango will not be the same dance if gender roles are changed or reversed. (See The Gender Roles in Tango.)

I don't think the transformation of gender roles and the influence of LGBT can be simply seen as progress. Trend and progress cannot always be used synonymously. Although feminism and homosexuality are fashionable in many Western societies today, blindly following the trend can lead to unintended consequences. That tango is at odds with the trend may be a blessing to the Western world because through tango it is easy to understand how men and women can live together in peace and harmony, at least for most people. This doesn’t mean that some people may not have their own choice and that most people should not accept them. But some people should understand that their choice must not be the choice of all people. It is simply not true to say that those who do not make the same choice as they do are all misogynic and homophobic, and those who do not dance tango the same way as they do are all anti-progression.

The central matter being discussed concerns the purpose of sex. Individuals who hold the belief that sex is solely for pleasure argue that a person can engage in sexual activities with any consenting partner, regardless of their gender. From the perspective of liberalism and individualism, this is viewed as a matter of personal freedom; therefore, they advocate for society to not only acknowledge this as a right but also establish legal frameworks that enable individuals to freely adopt this lifestyle.

On the other hand, people who perceive sex as a responsibility associated with procreation and raising the next generation maintain that the aforementioned perspective and lifestyle are not beneficial for society and humanity as a whole. They argue that individualism is a flawed ideology because humans are not autonomous entities but rather interconnected and interdependent social beings. The pursuit of unrestricted personal freedom at the expense of society is ultimately detrimental to individuals themselves. The way we approach tango is not merely a matter of experimenting and exploring new things. It is about choosing a dancing style that aligns with our values and way of life. (See Tango and Individualism.)


Part Two


Although humans possess intelligence that allows them to intervene and manipulate nature, their short-sightedness hinders their ability to comprehend the long-term effects of their actions due to their limited lifespan. Modern humans lack recollection of events that occurred tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, or even millions of years ago. Monogamy, the practice of marrying one pair of non-blood-related man and woman, serves as a eugenic mechanism that benefits humanity's best interests. This institution is resulted from over millions of years of human evolution, shaped by numerous positive and negative reproductive experiences. However, modern society has forgotten the validity of this institution, and alternative forms of marriage have become fashionable. But, no matter how smart humans are, what is of nature is still the soundest, most proper and most fit outcome, as it has undergone an extensive process of evolution through natural selection, perfected little by little in the millions of years of making. Human interventions, in contrast, tend to be revolutionary and experimental, often leading catastrophic consequences.

Modern contraceptive technology is an example of such human interventions. Contraception changes human sexual behavior from that for reproduction to that for pleasure. Once this breach is made, a series of consequences follow. Contraception leads to sexual freedom, which leads to the spread of pleasure-oriented sexual behaviors including homosexuality, which leads to the alienation of traditional marriage, which leads to the disintegration of monogamous families, which leads to the decay of the family-centered value system - a process that has already begun in Europe and North America. One ant hole could cause the entire dyke to collapse. If sex is just for pleasure, then there is no reason to ban homosexuality. If the ban on homosexuality is lifted, then why not that on bisexuality, transgender sexuality, group sex, incest, pedophilia, sodomy, adultery, prostitution, and every other form of pleasure-oriented sex? In many Western societies, legislations have been passed to allow same-sex marriage, which changes marriage from that between a man and a woman for reproduction to that between gays or lesbians for sexual pleasure. If sexual pleasure is a good reason for marriage, then why should marriage be limited to non-consanguineous adults? Why brother and sister, brother and brother, sister and sister, father and daughter, father and son, mother and daughter, mother and son, and other close relatives should not form a sexual relationship through marriage for the same reason? And why should marriage be limited to two persons? Why polygamy, polyandry and group marriage are not allowed? In fact, why is marriage even necessary at all if it is not for the procreation and upbringing of the next generation? As long as reproduction and children are not involved, a person choose to have sex with whom and with how many people is a personal affair. Liberal individualism and feminism, therefore, maintains that sex is a natural right that should not be limited to a monogamous relationship between only a man and a woman.

But contrary to this liberal view, marriage is not a natural right but a privilege granted to non-consanguineous adults of the opposite sexes exclusively, for it is related to the reproduction and upbringing of the next generation, hence the well-being of society as a whole. Various offbeat sexual relationships are contrary to the best interests of the species, therefore are prohibited by law - first by natural law in the prehistoric period for at least tens of thousands of years if not longer, followed by statute in the historical period for at least thousands of years. Societies that did not comply with this law have been eliminated in the natural selection process. Now, by means of contraception humans can enjoy the pleasure of non-consequential sex, open-minded people therefore start to advocate the lift of the ban. In the US, the gay rights movement is surging. So far, sixteen states have passed same-sex marriage legislations. Homosexuality, bisexuality, adultery, sodomy and incest, which have never ceased to exist but previously were done in the closet, now start to enjoy some legitimacy and popularity thanks to these legislations. When such ideas become the generally accepted norms, sexual freedom, the alienation of marriage, the destruction of the human eugenic institution, the disintegration of traditional families, the decline in quantity and quality of the population, and the replacement of the population by another population that complies with natural law are bound to occur. Such moral decay on a biblical scale is now happening again in societies embracing liberalism and feminism. Modern Westerners have completely forgotten the lessons in human history that societies and civilizations withered because of this.


Part Three


As human beings, homosexuals are entitled to their basic human rights, which include the freedom to choose their sexual partners and form relationships. Nonetheless, we must recognize that widespread adoption of homosexuality could potentially harm the ability of the species to reproduce. Marriage equality, i.e., treating heterosexual relationship and homosexual relationship equally, thus blurring the distinctions between the two, is not a good idea in my opinion. It is another serious human intervention against nature. As mentioned above, marriage is a eugenic institution resulted from millions of years of human reproductive practices. It is a privilege granted only to non-blood-related adults of the opposite sexes for procreation. For the best interests of the human species, this privilege must be protected by law. Failure to do so will have serious consequences.

The notion of "marriage equality" implies that gender is irrelevant in forming a sexual partnership, that marriage does not have to be between a man and a woman, that every human person is entitled to have sex with anyone, including those of the same gender, that it is moral to have a homosexual or bisexual relationship with more than one partner, that marriage is not a eugenic institution but only a lifestyle, that sex is only for pleasure with no social responsibilities attached, that procreation and upbringing of the next generation is not the function of marriage, that the healthy growth of children does not depend on the presence and joint efforts of both father and mother, that the welfare incentives intended to encourage marriage between a man and a woman for procreation should also be extended to homosexual partnerships, and that individual rights, personal freedom, self-indulgence and self-interest are the only thing that matters. Can you imagine how these false ideas, if sponsored by the state, enforced by law, enhanced by politically motivated media coverages, TV shows, movies, popular literature, school education and workplace regulations etc. could influence the young minds and impact the future of humanity?

We know that introducing alien species may endanger native species, marketing genetically modified food may result in the reduction of natural food supply, promoting tango Nuevo may inhibit traditional tango, taking affirmative action may cause reversed discrimination, etc. Instances of this kind are too numerous to mention. It's human nature to be drawn to the new and abandon the old. People rush to follow what is fashionable and despise what is traditional. Those who question the new trend are blamed down, as if what has been proven is obsolete and not good anymore, but what is experimental is instead the cutting edge and progressive. If monogamy marriage as the eugenic institution were not protected, the disintegration of traditional families, the rise of same-sex marriage, gay families and single parent families, the reversed discrimination, and the decline in population quantity and quality would become inevitable.

More importantly, failure to protect traditional marriage will undermine the family-centered value system on which human civilization is based. The natural, mutually supportive, interdependent, complementary, and cooperative relationship between the opposite sexes is the cornerstone of all human relationships. From this relationship comes children, families, societies, and the subsequent moral and political systems that form the basis of civilization. In other words, it is through the most intimate reproductive relationship that people learn to love, cooperate, and get along with each other. The decline of the family will have a profound impact on society because the weakening of family ties will inevitably lead to the rise of individualism with an emphasis on personal freedom, independence and self-interest while denying the interdependence and the need for cooperation and compromise among people. (See Tango and Family Values.) Feminism as a replica of individualism on gender issues opposes the interdependence of the two sexes, advocates women’s independence, encourages women to emancipate from family, to fight for their own rights, to be strong and aggressive like men, to compete with men, and not to be outdone by men, etc. Such radical propositions can only exacerbate the antagonism and confrontation between the two sexes and are not conducive to social harmony. (See Femininity and Feminism in Tango (II).) The way to improve the relationship is to be respectful, kind, acceptant, friendly, agreeable, cooperative, yielding, loving and accommodating to each other rather than being rejective, resentful, hostile, confrontational, aggressive, and uncompromising to each other. The recent government shutdown caused by refusing to make concessions serves as an alarming example of the impairment of such extremist ideologies. (See Meeting in the Middle.)


Part Four


Gay rights movement, feminism and individualism have an undeniable influence on tango. Feminism disapproves the surrender and obedience of women to men in tango, advocates that the woman should maintain her independence, that the man should propose instead of taking the lead, that the woman may choose how, when or whether to accept his proposal, that the woman is free to express herself and initiate her own steps, that the man must respect her autonomy, and that the woman may also lead the man or another woman, etc. Some authors write books to advertise this kind of ideas. Like-minded teachers also promote such ideas through their teachings, and students naively mistaking radicalism for progress blindly follow the trend, causing the alienation of tango and changing it from a dance in which the two sexes collaborate to achieve oneness and harmony, to a dance in which the two sexes are distant and antagonistic, focusing only on personal performances. (See Tango and the Interdependence between the Sexes.)

I believe most people are not extremists. But living in a society that “rejects misogyny, rejects homophobia, and encourages empathy” few people can be completely immune to this kind of brainwashing. We often see beginners stick to the attitude that they have obtained over a long period of time, think of oneself as an independent individual rather than being in relationships with others, regard oneself not as part of the whole, and think of others as rivals, etc. Most people, after going through a period of learning, will gradually overcome such self-centered mindset and adopt a cooperative attitude consistent with tango. (SeeThe Spirit of Tango.) But there are people who cannot overcome individualistic mentality even after years of learning. Students of the contemporary age need to know that learning tango is acquiring a new set of values different from the values of the world. The world is about competition and winning. Tango is about cooperation and harmony. The world believes that balance is gained through might and power. Tango believes that balance is achieved through collaboration and accommodation. Tango is not about individuality, independence, personal freedom and self-interest, but achieving unity and harmony through cooperation. (See The Freedom in Tango.) The principles of tango such as surrender, obedience, yielding, agreement, collaboration, accommodation, complement and love, not only help the two partners to dance in unison but also provide universal values for people to live together in peace and harmony. (See The World Needs a Different Philosophy.)

Whenever cooperation is involved, division of labor is necessary. For example, in the family, men usually do more physically demanding tasks and women do more light chores. Such natural division of labor is based on the physiologies of the two sexes, not at all some form of discrimination. In tango, the man leads the woman and the woman beautifies the dance, which, too, is a natural division of labor based on the physiological characteristics of the two sexes, not at all some form of gender inequality. Do you think it looks natural for a woman to lead a man and for him to embellish the dance? When you see a gal leads a guy, and the guy wriggles his body and twists his ass, pretending to be feminine, do you think that looks beautiful? You have seen couples of the same sex dancing and in them there is only femininity and no masculinity, or only masculinity and no femininity, do you think that is appealing? Tango is governed by the law of dance, not ideologies. I need not to repeat what has been dwelt upon in my other articles on gender roles. Please click the links if you haven't read them already: The Gender Roles in Tango, Femininity and Feminism in Tango (I), Femininity and Feminism in Tango (II), Tango and Gender Equality, The Gender Expression in Tango, The Chivalty of the Milongueros, Tango and Interdependence between the Sexes. I believe those who are not driven by narrow-minded and extremist ideologies will not find such division of labor discriminative against women. Male chauvinists use the division of labor between sexes as an evidence of male superiority and female inferiority, which is absurd. Feminists therefore want to repeal or reverse gender roles, which is equally ridiculous.

I believe tango is a good thing for the Western world. Real social progress is not radical, but gradual, rational, moderate and peaceful as nature is. Nature in its norm is not revolutionary but evolutionary, leading to coexistence, balance and harmony, the recognition of the connections of various things and the abandonment of radical ideologies like individualism, feminism, neoliberalism and power politics, to communal interests rather than self-interest, integration rather than segregation, adaptation rather than antagonism, moderation rather than extremism, compromise rather than obstinacy, love rather than hatred, and peace rather than war. In other words, nature is in opposition to the extremist Western tendency against nature. Tango embodies the principles on how the opposite sexes can get alone with each other by the very nature of their being - mutual attraction, interdepencence, complement, accommodation, collaboration and love, which are the reasons of its popularity. Tango can help people to understand the harm of hostility and the benefit of cooperation. It provides useful lessons for us to live together in peace and harmony, thus is conducive to true human progress. (See The Lessons of Tango.)



6 comments:

  1. Hi Paul,

    Good to see you writing again.
    The reader that commented is certainly entitled to their opinion. But I couldn’t agree more with your response. So many thoughts came to mind as I was reading it. I’ll just say this for now. When a lady completely surrenders to me when we dance, it makes me work even harder to take care of her and protect her. It makes me work harder to keep the beautify connection, communication and the embrace because I don’t want to lose it and I don’t want to let go of her at the end of the tanda.
    I’ve danced with a few that try to back lead me and the only thing I can think of is “when is this tanda going to end”. There is no connection, communication, no embrace THERE IS NO TANGO.

    LeRoy

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  2. Tango can only be danced between a man and a woman. It is the beautiful harmony and balance between man and woman, The intimacy between masculine and feminine. Any thing other than this is not Tango.
    They can call it what ever they want, dance where ever they want, play what ever music but it will never be Tango. Men dancing with men, women with women will never be Tango.

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  3. I cannot agree with anonymous above on their point that "women with women will never be Tango". Tango is an expression of movement, much like any other dance is. It is also a conversation. Saying that two women cannot dance tango is akin to saying that two women cannot have a conversation and that is nonsensical. The most fun dances I've had are with women leaders because they have a different manner of interepreting music and are less hard-pressed to throw in as many moves as the men are, result in them really listening to the music and playing with basic steps which make this dance so enjoyable. That is my experience with tango with my own gender.

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  4. Hi Glitter (from anonymous above) I certainly appreciate your point of view and I thank you for it. I find it interesting that a dance has stirred up so much talk on the internet.
    A little more from my point of view, first as I mentioned before, women dancing with women will never be Tango. Tango is much more than an expression of movement. It is unlike any other dance. It is the warm and gentle embrace between man and women. It is the intimacy and emotional connection that Tango ignites between a man and a woman. The man carefully leads his partner and protects her and the woman makes the dance beautiful with her elegance and femininity.
    I do agree that two women can do Tango steps together and have fun doing it but that is not Tango. Two women can have a verbal conversation, but are they intimately and emotionally connected? If you have only danced with men that are more focused on doing as many steps as possible and putting on a show for the audience and not listening to the beautiful music, then you have only danced with beginners. Base on your reply, I can only guess that you have not been Tangoed by a Miloguero.
    I hope some day you dance with a Miloguero that will rock your Tango world.

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  5. I'm sorry but I found it extremely narrow-minded to state that "men dancing with men will never be tango". Historically, I'm sure you are aware that tango in Buenos Aires developed with many instances of men dancing with men. And this continues with the many same-gender pair that are brilliant examples of tango dancing - whether nuevo or traditional. Let's not restrict ourselves with artificial and un-necessary limitations. Tango is an art of dancing to the music and it is an evolving art, it is international and though it has many rules and traditions, it shouldn't be restricted to man-woman only. I've had many lovely tandas with talented women leads as well as men, so I completely disagree that those experiences aren't all tango.

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  6. First they say "man with man is still tango." Then they say "I've had many lovely tandas with other men." Then they say "don't be so narrow, come on, open up!" Then they say "try it yourself, you may like it." Then they say "why don't we try something else together?"

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