Balancing Reliance and Lightness in Tango

The inherent bond and dynamic interplay between the opposite sexes in tango reflect their complementary qualities. Men embody strength, while women exude a certain fragility. These differences create unique psychological needs. A man’s strength provides a woman with a sense of security, allowing her to relax and feel safe in his companionship. Conversely, a woman’s tenderness and dependence fulfill a man’s innate desire to protect. This very human interaction is what makes tango so captivating. It combines the delicacy and dependence of women with the strength and responsibility of men, creating a harmonious complement that satisfies both. Women are drawn to tango because it allows them to feel connected, supported, and loved, fulfilling their vulnerability and dependence in a secure way. Meanwhile, men are attracted to tango because it enables them to step into a role of strength and leadership. They find satisfaction in guiding, protecting, and responding to women’s needs and being rewarded by their femininity.

However, this balance can only be achieved when both partners understand their roles and work together (see The Gender Roles in Tango). Here’s the challenge: men enjoy women's attachment and dependence on them, but if a woman relies too much on a man, he may feel she is “heavy.” Conversely, if she is too independent, the connection and intimacy break down. Thus, it is crucial to find the right balance.

1. Trust Fully, but Stay Engaged
To satisfy a man’s desire to take responsibility and feel needed, a woman must entrust herself to him. This means letting go of control, overcoming the urge to act independently, and surrendering to his lead. This trust allows the dance to flow seamlessly. But surrendering doesn’t mean becoming passive. A woman must stay engaged and responsive, meeting his strength with her own energy.

2. The 30/70 Rule: Dependence and Independence
A good rule of thumb for women in tango is to maintain 30% dependence and 70% independence. This balance ensures that your partner feels your trust and reliance without becoming overburdened. Occasionally, you can shift toward greater dependence, but always return to this foundational balance. If you are too dependent, he may feel as though he is carrying you. If you are too independent, he may feel as though he is not trusted (see Tango and Trust).

3. Interweave Dependence and Independence
Rather than adhering to a single mode of dancing, alternate between dependence and independence. Depend on him most of the time, then show a touch of your own initiative occasionally. This dynamic interplay of connection and momentary separation keeps the dance engaging and alive.

4. Be Self-Driven, but Subtle
Here’s a key skill: learn to activate your own movements while still following his lead. Stay light on your feet, maintain your balance, and push with your standing leg to power your movements. However, don’t let your partner feel you are driving yourself. Men enjoy feeling in charge, and if they sense you’re dancing independently, they may feel unneeded. The trick is to subtly support the movements without making it obvious. Think of it as adding your own energy to his lead, enhancing the connection without overshadowing it.

5. Make Him Feel Needed and Empowered
Ultimately, the goal is to make your partner feel strong, capable, and in control without overwhelming him. Show him that you trust and depend on him, but also that you’re light and self-sufficient. When you strike this balance, the dance becomes a true partnership, with both partners contributing to its magic.

Balancing reliance and lightness is no easy feat. It is a testament to a woman’s emotional intelligence, requiring awareness, sensitivity, refinement, and sophistication. But once you master this art, your tango will transform. You will experience a deeply connected, intimate, and satisfying dance. When you find the perfect balance between strength and vulnerability, dependence and independence, your tango will become one of the most fulfilling experiences (see Tango and Gender Interdependence).

Achieving Comfortable Arm and Hand Position in Close Embrace

In close embrace, the man's left elbow and the woman's right elbow are bent at approximately 75 degrees, allowing their hands to meet at shoulder height. The natural position of their hands has the palms facing their own body centers, with thumbs on top and little fingers on the bottom. However, this positioning prevents their hands from clasping properly—they need to face each other to interlock. Initially, both partners may adjust their hand positions to accommodate one another, but during dancing, men often unconsciously revert to facing their palms inward, causing the woman's hand to twist outward uncomfortably.

To prevent this issue, the man must keep his palm facing the woman instead of toward his body center. He can also extend his left arm outward rather than keeping it raised in front of his shoulder—this naturally orients his palm toward the woman. Alternatively, the partners may avoid clasping hands altogether. The woman can instead place the lower part of her palm on his upturned palm or allow him to hold the back of her hand. This eliminates any twisting or discomfort in her right hand.

The man should lead with his torso rather than relying on his arms and hands. He must keep his arms and hands completely relaxed to avoid unconsciously using them to guide movements. If the woman feels that her hand is being held too tightly, she should signal the man to adjust his grip rather than waiting until the dance is over to mention it. It’s common for dancers to have habits that the other finds uncomfortable. Communication is essential, and both partners should work together to adapt and accommodate each other during the dance.

Many women, especially those who haven't yet learned to relax, wrap their left arm tightly around the man's right arm, not realizing that this puts weight on his arm, restricting its movement and making him feel heavy and uncomfortable. This positioning also shifts their body to the right side of the man, reducing sensitivity to subtle changes in his body position, which is one of the reasons women fail to do the cruzada.

The proper embrace is symmetrical, with the two partners facing each other chest-to-chest. His left hand and her right hand hold at shoulder height, his right arm wraps around her body, and her left arm hooks over his right shoulder, so the two are perfectly aligned. This correct embrace is not only the most intimate and comfortable for both partners, but it also allows the woman to sense subtle changes in the man's body position, so when he walks on her right, she will naturally reposition her body with the cruzada to put her body back in alignment with him (see Why Women Fail to Do Cruzada).

Tango, as an intimate, feeling-oriented dance, must be danced in the most comfortable and communicable embrace. Dancers should not just go with their own habits or social preconception and ignore the comfort of their partner. A proper embrace, as described above, is one that is the most comfortable for both parties. Although this embrace may not align with someone's personal preference, dancers must accommodate each other, even put their partner's needs before their own. For beginners, this is often the first hurdle they have to overcome.

Reflections on My New Tango Home

Since moving to this city, I’ve been dancing at this particular milonga for about two years. The dance floor is a rectangular space, approximately 45 feet long and 30 feet wide. Typically, 40 to 50 people come here to dance, most of them seasoned tango dancers in their 50s, 60s, and 70s, with a handful of younger or less-experienced participants. The gender ratio is approximately 27 men to 23 women, putting the men at a slight disadvantage. Interestingly, a couple of women prefer to lead, and most men tend to avoid dancing with these female leaders, which exacerbates the shortage of followers.

Most women here are familiar with cabeceo, though a few are not, and these women receive fewer invitations as a result (see Women’s Role in Cabeceo). Apart from a handful of exceptions, most people dance in a traditional close embrace, and dancers with different styles rarely partner up. Overall, this milonga has an above-average dance level, which I really appreciate. However, the sense of community could be warmer. In America, this isn’t unusual—people come here to dance, not necessarily to form deep connections. By contrast, in Buenos Aires, a group of people who dance together regularly will quickly form strong bonds.

I regularly dance with most of the women here, though there are a few I haven’t danced with—not because I don’t want to, but because they haven’t shown any interest. My rule is simple: I only dance with women who are friendly and open to dancing with me. If someone acts dismissive, I don’t ask them to dance. I’m not entirely sure why some women seem aloof. Do they have very high standards? Do they only dance with fixed partners? Do they think that invitations are only a man’s job? I prefer not to assume the worst because I believe most people are genuinely kind. One possible explanation is that they are socially inexperienced or lack cabeceo skills. Regardless, I have my principles, and since I’m not lacking partners, I haven’t danced with them yet (see Tango Etiquette: Eye Contact, Talking, Clique and Hierarchy).

There’s a sizable tango community in this city, and this milonga, with its seasoned dancers, often attracts visitors. However, these visitors rarely return, perhaps due to the lack of a warm and welcoming atmosphere I mentioned earlier. I’ve also visited a few other milongas in this city, but the dancers there tend to avoid engaging with newcomers, so I didn’t stay either. It’s a common issue, and I believe there is room for improvement. Some possible solutions might include encouraging people to greet each other before the dance begins, providing cabeceo education, prompting everyone to dance at least once with someone new, or requiring dancers to rotate partners during the first tanda after the break. These small changes could help break the ice and foster a more inviting environment (see Tango Is a Fellowship).

To me, a good milonga requires three essentials: an amicable atmosphere, experienced dancers, and good music. There are several DJs here who mostly play classic tango hits from the Golden Age. While a few have unique tastes that don’t always align with mine, most DJs strike a good balance in their selections. Overall, I’m satisfied with the music here, though I think the selection quality could still improve to make this milonga even better. It’s not about novelty—it’s about choosing tracks that are great for dancing. The more classic and familiar the music, the better—this is akin to playing musical instruments, where well-loved pieces often resonate best with both players and listeners. I don’t understand why Pugliese is rarely played here. Considering most dancers here are experienced, adding more Pugliese might be a thoughtful touch (see My Two Cents on Music Selection).

Tango and Trust

Trust forms the foundation of human social life, acting as the glue that binds relationships and society together. Our need for trust arises from our inherent vulnerabilities, personal limitations, and interdependence. As social beings, humans seek trust-based connections that foster cooperation, teamwork, and mutual support—both physical and emotional. Trust fulfills not only practical needs, such as collaboration for survival and success, but also emotional needs, like overcoming loneliness and finding safety and connection. It is the mechanism through which we navigate vulnerability, form bonds, exchange support, and maintain social harmony. Without trust, we would struggle alone, unable to manage these fundamental aspects of life.

Tango, in particular, satisfies this universal need for trust, which is one of the reasons for its enduring popularity. As a dance of intimacy, connection, and surrender, tango transcends mere enjoyment or performance. It provides a sanctuary from loneliness, a space to express vulnerability, and an opportunity to seek solace in another's embrace. In tango, we long to touch and be touched, to lean on someone's shoulder, and to quench the thirst for connection and love. Dancing tango requires complete trust between partners, so that they can fully engage and immerse themselves in the experience. Tango heals psychologically by allowing us to expose our vulnerability and inner selves. This exposure or openness requires trust. Without it, dancers cannot give themselves completely, nor can they reap the emotional and psychological rewards of the dance.

On a practical level, trust is equally essential in tango because this dance relies on close physical contact, non-verbal communication, and mutual reinforcement to execute the movements, requiring dancers to be physically and mentally attuned to each other and trust that their partner will always be there for support. Trust sets dancers free. If trust is lacking, dancers can become self-conscious and tense, holding back emotionally and hesitating to let go. Unfortunately, this lack of trust remains a persistent challenge in our tango.

This struggle with trust in tango mirrors a broader societal issue. The erosion of trust in American society stems from a confluence of factors: rampant selfishness, systemic corruption, economic instability, heightened stress and competition, rising inequality, high inflation, commercial fraud, cybercrime, partisan divides, ideological conflicts, and media-driven misinformation. These forces create an atmosphere of suspicion and distrust. American culture prioritizes self-reliance, individual achievement, and personal success. People often focus more on their own needs and strategies than on moral considerations and collective well-being. This heightens tension, competition, and mistrust between individuals. As people face economic hardships, political polarization, and widespread deceit, they grow guarded, wary of manipulation and betrayal. This pervasive mistrust spills over into personal interactions, making it challenging to embrace the vulnerability that tango demands. When we don’t trust, we disengage, choosing alienation and control over connection and cooperation.

Tango offers profound lessons in the value of trust. In a world where trust is increasingly fragile, this intimate dance reminds us that human connection and cooperation are only possible when we trust each other. By embracing trust on the dance floor, we might rediscover how to restore it in the wider world. Confucius recognized trust as one of the essential human virtues, alongside benevolence, justice, propriety, and wisdom. Tango, with its foundation in trust, serves as a powerful reminder of these qualities and a means to rebuild faith in our shared humanity. Through this dance of vulnerability and connection, we can relearn how to rely on one another. Tango teaches us the joy that comes from surrendering control in the right context, reminding us that not every moment requires us to be in charge. Often, the most profound fulfillment lies in trusting each other and moving together in harmony.

The Impact of Chinese Characters

Chinese characters are one of the most ingenious inventions of the Chinese people. China is a vast country, comparable in size to Europe, with two-thirds of its total area being mountainous. In ancient times, when transportation was underdeveloped, different regions were relatively isolated, leading to the formation of numerous local dialects. People speaking these different dialects often struggled to communicate with each other. (See Tango Is a Language (II).)

To overcome this challenge, the resourceful Chinese people invented Chinese characters—a system of ideograms. Unlike phonetic writing systems, each character represents a meaning rather than a sound. This enabled people from different regions to communicate through the written system, despite their differing pronunciations.

The disadvantage of Chinese characters is that they are difficult to learn. A person needs to master over three thousand characters to be considered educated. The complexity of the characters and their vast number present significant challenges to literacy, as learning them demands considerable time and effort.

However, the advantage of Chinese characters is that they provide a unified means of communication for people speaking different dialects. This has prevented China from splitting into multiple countries, as happened in Europe. In many ways, Chinese characters form the bedrock and vessel of Chinese civilization, through which its enduring culture is recorded and passed down. Chinese characters not only prevent the division of the Chinese nation, but they also enhance national cohesion. Throughout its long history, China has been invaded numerous times by northern nomads. In order to govern China, these invaders had to adopt Chinese characters and embrace the rich Chinese culture preserved through them. In doing so, they ultimately assimilated into Chinese civilization and became part of it.

The common written language has played a crucial role in maintaining unified and effective governance, enabling the centralized administration of a vast and diverse country, facilitating trade and cultural exchange, and fostering a shared identity among the Chinese people. In addition, Chinese characters have been pivotal in preserving the integrity of Chinese culture. Western phonetic languages are more susceptible to foreign influences. English, for instance, incorporates 1,000-4,000 new words annually. This linguistic mutability contributes to the instability of Western culture. In contrast, the Chinese language is far more stable and resistant to external influences. Its vocabulary consists of characters, making it easier to learn and create new terms once these characters are mastered. This has significant implications in the age of AI, as processing a dataset of a few thousand unique Chinese characters requires significantly less computing power than handling a corpus exceeding one million unique English words. Moreover, Chinese calligraphy, as an art form, has profoundly shaped the aesthetic taste of the Chinese people.

As ideograms, Chinese characters carry meanings and values, such as benevolence (仁), propriety (禮), and filial piety (孝). China, with its long history, has a wealth of classical literature. A large number of Chinese words, idioms, concepts and expressions still used by modern Chinese people can find their origins in these classics. Understanding them requires some background knowledge. For example, the character 信 consists of two parts: 人 (man) on the left and 言 (word) on the right. 信 means a man should keep his words, as Confucius said, "Man cannot succeed without good faith (人無信不立)." Chinese children learn their language by studying Chinese characters and texts, which encapsulate the wisdom of countless generations, embedding moral values and social sagacity within the very fabric of the language. Learning Chinese instills in students an appreciation of their cultural heritage and traditional values. This deep connection between language, history, culture and values gives educated Chinese a unique character. I often feel that the Chinese people are fortunate because their language makes them a wise, cohesive, collectivist, cooperative, moderate, and moral people.

In summary, the impact of Chinese characters on Chinese society is both profound and multifaceted. They have not only facilitated communication but also maintained national unity. The shared written language preserves cultural heritage and values, reinforcing social cohesion and a strong national identity. Furthermore, the moral principles and social values embedded in Chinese characters and classical texts continue to shape contemporary Chinese society, influencing behavior and social interactions. The enduring legacy of Chinese characters stands as a testament to the ingenuity of the Chinese people and their ability to adapt while staying true to their identity in an ever-changing world. (See Understanding China: Geography, Confucianism, and Chinese-Style Modernization.)

The Advantages of Simplicity over Flashy Movements

The most evocative tangos, those that truly capture the music's essence and the dancers' emotions, are often danced with simple steps. Tango, at its core, is a dialogue between two souls—not a showcase of intricate movements. Simple steps allow dancers to immerse themselves fully in the subtlety of the music and the depth of their emotions. This fosters a profound connection and inward focus, enabling more meaningful communication between partners. True beauty emanates from within, thriving in the connection, intimacy, harmony, and agreement shared by the dancers. These qualities are best expressed through Zen-like simplicity rather than flamboyant, showy movements. Indeed, simple elegance resonates more deeply than complexity.

Art often finds its greatest power in conciseness. Complex Chinese characters are simplified in practice; a modestly decorated house feels more inviting than one crowded with excessive adornments. Similarly, in dance, graceful, straightforward movements exude elegance far more effectively than intricate figures. Artistic simplicity, a principle central to aesthetics, frequently yields unexpected and superior results (see Simple Is Beautiful).

In contrast, performances driven by flashy movements often come across as artificial and superficial. Elaborate footwork and intricate choreography can obscure tango's essence, distracting dancers from fully engaging with the music, their emotions, and their partner. The pursuit of spectacle over substance may inhibit dancers' ability to respond intuitively to musical shifts and partner cues. The resulting performance risks feeling disjointed, cluttered, and contrived, lacking the spontaneous, vibrant, and authentic spirit of true tango.

Though this may represent an extreme example, the tendency toward ostentation is not uncommon in tango. In a modern culture often enamored with gaudiness and pretense, it is vital for tango enthusiasts to resist the urge to show off. Instead, they should focus on what truly matters: the music, the emotion, and the connection with their partner. By keeping things simple, minimizing the frills, and sticking to simple steps, dancers can create a tango experience that is much more intimate, soulful and satisfying. After all, it's not about putting on a show - it's about sharing a moment, heart to heart (see Embracing Elegance).

Embracing Elegance

Tango's allure can be broadly categorized into two styles: elegant and fancy. Elegance, marked by simplicity, naturalness, refinement, and decorum, imbues the dance with grace, calmness, sophistication, and harmony. On the other hand, fanciness, characterized by intricate movements, elaborate figures, and striking embellishments, evokes liveliness, vibrancy, and creativity. Both styles hold a valuable place in tango, enriching its diversity and depth. The examples below illustrate both approaches.

Regrettably, in today's culture, where unconventionality and ostentation often dominate, fanciness is sometimes exaggerated by shallow imitators, leading to associations with flamboyance and frivolity. In this context, embracing elegance becomes even more significant, particularly in social tango.

Social tango is fundamentally a conversation between two souls, centered on internal experiences rather than outward display. This introspective focus cultivates elegance—its simplicity embodies harmony and fosters a profound connection with the essence of the dance. That’s why tango milonguero, the most popular style of social tango, emphasizes elegance over fanciness. While the allure of showcasing flashy moves and intricate footwork may seem irresistible, true mastery of tango lies in the pursuit of its essence. (See The Advantages of Simplicity over Flashy Movements.)

Even fancy styles, when approached with taste and restraint, can reflect elegance rather than ostentation, as seen in the examples above. For dancers seeking to transcend mere performance, elegance offers a path toward a deeper experience and timeless beauty. Unlike fleeting trends, elegance leaves a lasting impression on both dancers and observers. A truly elegant tango performance captivates not through the complexity of steps, but through the beauty and grace that radiate from the dancers’ genuine inner selves.

But perhaps the most compelling reason to embrace elegance lies in its transformative effect. Refining an elegant style is not merely about technique—it is a journey of self-discovery. It encourages letting go of the urge to impress and instead fosters deeper connections with one’s partner, the music, and oneself. Elegance teaches the art of restraint: achieving more through less. By stripping away excessive embellishments and focusing on the purity of natural movement, we experience a newfound sense of authenticity and depth. We discover that true beauty lies not in the outward display, but in the inward journey of music, connection and interaction with another soul (see True Beauty Comes from Within).

To all tango dancers seeking to transcend the ordinary, consider the words of Audrey Hepburn: “Elegance is the only beauty that never fades.” Embrace it, embody it, and let it guide your journey toward mastering the dance. (See The Elegance of the Milonguero Style.)

Ismael Choreography

Ismael Heljalil (1929-2018) was a revered figure within the milonguero community, known for his kind nature and gentle demeanor. Though details about his life remain scarce, his legacy endures through the dance videos he left behind, offering glimpses into his gentle character and profound love for tango.

What distinguishes Ismael Heljalil from his peers is his distinctive choreography, characterized by a seamless fusion of rock, retreats and rotations. A hallmark of his style is the rock steps with the left leg as the fulcrum to place his right leg behind, culminating in a graceful pivoting to the right. (Please click the links to watch on YouTube.)

This movement can be mirrored with the left leg by stepping back with his left leg and pivoting to the left. Ismael often combines walking forward in a circle and walking backward in a circle, either to the right or to the left. No one can alternate these circular movements with forward and backward steps as seamlessly as Ismael does. This remarkable ability hinges on his unparalleled musicality.

In essence, Ismael's dance style is characterized by a continuous rotation anchored in backward motion, skillfully blending elements of rock, back steps, and turns. This unique approach sets him apart, inspiring many to emulate his technique, yet few can truly replicate his finesse. What is difficult to copy is not his footwork, of course, but his comprehension of music, underscoring the depth of skill possessed by the master himself.

"If God could dance, he would dance like Ismael. He masterfully improvises what he feels in the moment. He walks, and oh…how he walks with intimate knowledge of every phrase and nuance of the music from his soul." - Jantango

Making Your Leading Stand Out

When leading tango, it is important to avoid cookie-cutter routines. Here are some tips to help you be a distinctive leader:

1. Embrace variety in your dance route: Instead of moving straight forward along the line of dance, dare to explore different directions and patterns, break away from monotony, frequent the change of direction, interweave different steps, and lead your partner in unexpected move patterns.

2. Incorporate backward steps: In tango, men mostly move forward and women move backward. If men could break the pattern and dance backwards, it would be a change for both parties and make the dance stand out.

3. Simplify your movements: In a world where complexity often reigns supreme, dare to stand out by embracing simplicity. Remember, less is often more when it comes to making a lasting impression.

4. Master the art of pivoting: In tango, it's customary for men to navigate the dance floor while women dance around men, often resulting in men relying on static steps. However, by integrating pivots into your movements to enable agile and fluid turns around the woman, your lead will truly shine.

5. Engage your torso and hips: Most men don't rotate their torso and hips very much when dancing. If you can engage your torso and hips more, your leading will reach a higher level. The rule of tango is that your torso must always face your partner, no matter which side of you she is on or moving to. The competence to swivel the torso and hips helps the man to maintain good connection with the woman and enhances his ability to use his torso to lead her.

6. Use a variety of rhythms：Most men dance too fast and in a monotonous speed. If you slow down the pace and use a variety of rhythms, your dance will stand out. Pause and slow motion are to dance what punctuation is to writing. They make the dance more expressive and interesting.

7. Lead her to turn in slow motion：Most women turn too hastily, either forced by men or due to their own habit of chasing the beat. But feminine beauty is, in fact, better revealed in slow motion. When leading steps that involve turns, such as molinete, ocho and planeo, if you can slow down her pace, that will make her movements look more appealing.

8. Dance to express, not to impress: Above all, remember that tango is a dance of connection and feelings. Instead of focusing on showcasing your technical prowess, dance with genuine emotion and feeling. Let the music guide you and inspire your movements. By dancing to express the music and feelings, you'll create a profound and unforgettable experience for both you and your partner.

Philosophies that Separate Two Worlds

Chinese philosophy embraces a holistic perspective, perceiving the world as an interconnected whole rather than fragmented parts. While acknowledging contradictions, it emphasizes harmony as the ultimate outcome, with opposing forces being interdependent and cooperative. Humanity, in this context, transcends individualism, focusing on communities where collective success arises from collaboration. At its core, this philosophy values unity, balance, coexistence, and mutual benefit, steering away from conflict and adversary elimination, and prioritizing cooperation (see Understanding China: Yellow River and the Character of the Chinese Nation).

Rooted in collectivism, Chinese philosophy prioritizes societal well-being over personal gain, advocating for social harmony grounded in public morality. Human rights extend beyond individual entitlements to encompass the collective good, emphasizing peaceful coexistence and equitable living conditions. Chinese law protects personal freedoms including the pursuit of wealth within legal boundaries, while placing restrictions on special interests to safeguard the interests of all people and society as a whole (see Understanding China: Geography, Confucianism, and Chinese-Style Modernization).

Economically, China promotes "common prosperity" through a blended model of state-owned enterprises, private business, and market mechanisms. This approach encourages personal initiative while ensuring a balance between the successful and the general population. It aims to blend market-driven growth with social equity. The state intervenes to make sure capital doesn’t harm broader societal interests.

Politically, China emphasizes the role of the state in fostering unity, managing differences, protecting the vulnerable, building infrastructure, and promoting the common good. It champions democratic centralism and national unity, rejecting decentralization and partisanship. China's democracy is described as a "people's democracy." It focuses on consensus-building through consultation, contrasting with the competitive, often divisive nature of Western electoral systems. It is also described as a "whole-process democracy," where citizens are involved in policymaking, implementation, and oversight. Decisions affecting people's lives are carefully deliberated and implemented with public input. By avoiding partisan strife, Chinese politics operates without catering to special interests, aiming to build an egalitarian and harmonious society where shared prosperity and happiness are prioritized.

On the global stage, China adheres to five key principles: mutual respect for sovereignty, non-aggression, non-interference, equality and mutual benefit, and peaceful coexistence. It promotes international cooperation, peaceful development, global common prosperity, and the creation of a community with a shared future for humanity.

In contrast, Western thought embraces an atomistic perspective, breaking the world down into separate, competing entities. Western individualism sees humans as independent actors with clashing interests, drawing on Darwinian ideas of the "struggle for existence" and "survival of the fittest." This perspective encourages a "law of the jungle" mindset, where defeating or suppressing opponents is considered essential for survival (see Darwinism and Confucianism). Western culture emphasizes self-reliance, individual achievement, and personal success. People often focus more on their own needs and strategies than on moral considerations and collective well-being. The Western human rights rhetoric is highly deceptive. While ostensibly promoting universal freedom, it in fact only serves a privileged minority, enabling them to exploit competitive advantages to defeat the disadvantaged majority, thereby controlling legislation, the economy, media, military affairs, and foreign policy to benefit themselves.

Economically, the West leans heavily on capitalism, self-interest, and competition. While this approach can spur growth in the short term, it often leads to unchecked greed, inequality, and social injustice, allowing capital to dominate national interests, benefitting only a small elite at the expense of broader society. The result is that the rich get richer, the poor get poorer, and for most people, freedom has become an illusion. This approach of prioritizing profit over production will eventually lead to the hollowing out of the economy, triggering systemic failures (see America Is in Big Trouble).

Politically, Western systems are marred by partisanship, social division and polarization. It is merely a formal form of democracy, driven by partisan interests, sensationalism, empty promises and ideological nonsense. Politicians funded by special interests work more for their donors than for ordinary citizens, leaving voters with limited influence beyond casting a ballot every few years (see Democracy vs. Plutocracy).

In global affairs, Western elites often adopt a hegemonic mindset, employing strategies like divide and conquer, imposing unilateral sanctions, inciting conflicts, and waging wars. These actions disrupt global stability and create turmoil around the world. The success of the West historically hinges on the conquest, colonization, genocide, exploitation, and plunder of weaker nations.

For a long time, the Chinese struggled to comprehend Western behaviors, yet they have now come to understand its underlying logic. Unless Western plutocrats alter their philosophical outlook, global peace remains elusive. This sentiment was succinctly expressed by the Chinese delegation during the Sino-US talks in Alaska: "We overestimated you and assumed you would adhere to basic diplomatic norms. We must clarify our stance: You lack the authority to assert dominance over China." Despite the potential dangers inherent in this worldview, Western plutocrats are unlikely to relinquish it. It may require the collapse of the existing paradigm before humanity can aspire to construct a new world.

Thankfully, it’s becoming increasingly clear which philosophy holds more promise for humanity. The world is undergoing unprecedented transformations. The ascent of China and the decline of the West have given countries in the Global South renewed hope, allowing them to glimpse a possible new world order characterized by civilized values, peaceful coexistence, mutual respect, equality, fairness, justice, and win-win cooperation—an alternative to the current system dominated by self-interest, inequality, bullying, exploitation, aggression and war (see Pluralism vs. Monism).

Understanding China: Yellow River and the Character of the Chinese Nation

China is a vast country, comparable in size to Europe. Two-thirds of its total area is mountainous, with a topography that is high in the west and low in the east. The western part of China consists of numerous mountain ranges, many with altitudes exceeding 5,000 meters. Among them, the highest Himalayas reaches 8,848 meters above sea level. The eastern region gradually transitions into a plain descending to below 50 meters above sea level.

The Yellow River originates from the Bayan Har Mountains, located in Qinghai Province and have an altitude of 5,369 meters. As the second longest river in China, it flows from west to east, crossing the Qinghai-Tibet Plateau, the Loess Plateau, the Inner Mongolia Plateau, and the North China Plain before finally emptying into the Bohai Sea. Its drainage basin spans 795,000 square kilometers and encompasses nine provinces: Qinghai, Sichuan, Gansu, Ningxia, Inner Mongolia, Shaanxi, Shanxi, Henan, and Shandong.

Millions of years ago, the area east of the Taihang Mountains in central North China (shown in the box on the map below) was part of the ocean. The North China Plain (the upper two-thirds of the green area on the map) was formed through the accumulation of sediment from the Yellow River over millions of years. The middle section of the Yellow River flows through the Loess Plateau, carrying a large amount of sediment. It transports 1.6 billion tons of sediment downstream every year, about a quarter of which remains on land, and the rest washes into the Bohai Sea. The silt deposited in the lower reaches of the Yellow River gradually raises the riverbed. Every once in a while, the Yellow River changes its course due to the blockage of large amounts of sediment. Wherever the terrain is low, that's where the diverted river will flow, bringing sediment with it. For millions of years, sediment from the Yellow River has filled the low areas back and forth, created the vast North China Plain, which is larger than Britain. Today, the Yellow River is still reclaiming land from the sea and steadily pushing the coastline eastward. Scientists estimated that the Bohai Sea will be filled in within a few hundred years, further expanding the North China Plain.

Archaeology has revealed that eight thousand years ago people were already living on this land created by the Yellow River. The North China Plain, the cradle of Chinese civilization, has long been the most densely populated, economically vibrant, and culturally prosperous region in China, thanks to its fertile soil, temperate climate, and abundant rainfall brought by the Pacific monsoon, making this region ideal for agriculture. While the Yellow River nourishes the people living on this land, it also brings them disasters. As the riverbed rises, people must continually reinforce the embankments to protect farmland and settlements on both sides. Over time, the riverbed gradually rose above the surrounding ground; in some areas, it now stands 5–10 meters above the terrain, turning the river into a "hanging river." Once an embankment breaks, it unleashes catastrophic flooding, sweeping away everything in its path. Historical records show that, in the past 2,500 years, the Yellow River has burst its banks 1,593 times and changed its course significantly 26 times. Each time the river floods, tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands, or even millions of people are killed or displaced. The Yellow River flood of 1897, related to domestic unrest and poor maintenance, claimed the lives of two million (some say seven million) people. Efforts to manage the river have never stopped since ancient times. Perhaps no other people in the world have such a deeply intertwined and paradoxical relationship with their mother river as the Chinese. They are grateful for the nourishment she provides, yet they harbor resentment for her harshness. But it is precisely with her rugged character that the Yellow River has cultivated the perseverance, tenacity, hard work, and resilience of the Chinese people.

Chinese parents tend to use strict discipline to train their children, preparing them to face the severe challenges of life. This is not unrelated to the fact that they themselves grew up under the temper of the Yellow River. Westerners who embrace individualism emphasize protecting children's independence and individuality. Chinese parents focus on fostering perseverance, endurance, and team spirit in their children. This approach to education is deeply connected to their harsh living environment. In front of the Yellow River, individuals are insignificant. Controlling the Yellow River relies on collective strength. Therefore, Chinese philosophy places great emphasis on collectivism and teamwork. Western philosophy conceptualizes individuals as independent actors, prioritizing personal interests over collective concerns. In contrast, Chinese philosophy perceives individuals as interconnected and interdependent members of society with a common destiny and shared interests and responsibilities. This prioritization of collective concerns over individual interests is heavily influenced by their shared burden imposed by the Yellow River.

The fertile, rich, yet troubled land of the middle and lower reaches of the Yellow River allows the people living there to not only enjoy the blessings of the river but also face the challenges it brings. This paradox has nurtured the dialectical thinking of the Chinese people. Unlike Westerners who often perceive things in stark black-and-white terms, the Chinese recognize the juxtaposition of opposing qualities in all things, much like the dual natures of the Yellow River. They understand that good fortune and misfortune are interdependent. This awareness enables them to navigate life's complexities with composure, remain vigilant during peaceful times, and identify opportunities within challenges. Chinese philosophy opposes simplistic and extreme ideologies, such as individualism, feminism, Darwinism, unipolarism, hegemonism, and zero-sum games. It embraces the idea that diverse elements complement and coexist peacefully, akin to the two sexes, believing that harmony, balance, and mutual benefit are the fundamental laws of nature. The Chinese adhere to the doctrine of the mean, striving for balance amidst oppositions and harmony in differences. This seemingly modest approach allows them to coexist harmoniously within an environment that is both contradictory and integrated. The Confucian opposition to forming factions and taking sides, as well as the Chinese people's rejection of Western-style partisan politics, reflects the wisdom imparted to them by the Yellow River. (See Philosophies that Separate Two Worlds.)

Managing China's huge population and coordinating their efforts to undertake large projects like regulating the Yellow River, which involves vast areas of land, huge amounts of manpower, enormous resources, comprehensive planning, and the joint efforts of the whole country, require a unified, centralized government with strong planning and organizational capabilities. The emphasis that Chinese people place on political stability is also connected to the management of the Yellow River, which demands a stable and efficient government. In fact, China's state power originated from the need to control the Yellow River. Dayu, the founder of the Xia Dynasty (circa 2070 BC–1600 BC), the first dynasty recorded in Chinese history, was the leader who organized the people to regulate the Yellow River. With thousands of years of experience, the Chinese have become adept at mobilizing and organizing the masses, honing themselves into the most organized, disciplined, and well-managed people. This has made the nation extraordinarily resilient and capable of facing its most severe challenges. The Western political model, based on individualism and partisanship, wherein different interest groups compete and alternate in power, may serve special interests but does not align with China’s realities.

In summary, the character, philosophy, culture, and political framework of the Chinese nation are deeply intertwined with the Yellow River. This influential river nurtures the people to embody qualities such as magnanimity, generosity, kindness, solidarity, resilience, and sophistication—reflecting the attributes of their mother river. A nation that has endured and overcome such severe challenges for millennia is invincible and should never be underestimated. (See Understanding China: Geography, Confucianism, and the Chinese-Style Modernization.)

Paola Tacchetti

Zhou Dunyi (1017-1073), a Confucian scholar from the Northern Song Dynasty (AD 960-1127), wrote a beautiful essay, On the Love of Lotus. The following is the English translation.

"There are many kinds of lovely flowers and plants. Tao Yuanming of the Jin Dynasty only loved chrysanthemums. Since the Tang Dynasty, affection for peonies has become a fashion. But my favorite is the lotus, which comes out of the mud but not stained, washed by clear waves but not looking coquettish. An emblem of purity, modesty and perfection, it stands there quietly, allowing its fragrance to waft far - something to be regarded reverently from a distance, and not be profaned. To me, chrysanthemum is the hermit among flowers, peony is the plutocrat among flowers, and lotus is the gentleman among flowers. Alas, few have loved the chrysanthemum since Tao Yuanming, and none love the lotus like myself, whereas the peony is a favorite with many people."

I was reminded of this essay when I watched Paola Tacchetti dance tango. I only saw her dance once many years ago in Buenos Aires. She was still very young at the time, dancing socially at Salon Canning. In a pool of sophisticated dancers, she was like a fresh lotus protruding from the water. Her partner, a prominent milonguero, kissed her hand to express his admiration for her after they danced, which left a deep impression on me.

Recently, I was reminded of the essay again when I watched some Paola Tacchetti's dancing videos taken around the same time. I like her style because she is a natural, without any pretense. Her dance has a pure and intrinsic beauty that is in sharp contrast to the affected fashion of today. Such innocent dance style is rare nowadays.

Tango conveys a person's character, values, aesthetics and taste. True beauty is gentlemanly - natural, simple, implicit and genuine, rather than pretentious and conceited. I hope the prose quoted above can inspire more dancers to become like Paola Tacchetti, especially in this age of ostentation and artiness.

Learning from a Talented Tango Girl

I was impressed by the skills, grace, musicality and control this little girl displayed in her dance, and believe adult dancers can learn something from her.

Here are few highlights from this dance.

Salida with forward step (0:07-0:14)
In a normal salida, the two partners step in parallel to the same side. But in this case the man alone took a side step to the left, while the girl swiveled her hips and took a forward rather than side step with her right leg, enabling her left leg to take another forward step and pivot, and her right leg to do a slow and beautiful planeo.

Split-leg turn and sandwich (0:26-0:31)
Most adult dancers do not spread their legs like a compass when turning, but this girl does that a lot, and she does it often in a reduced speed, adding grace to her dance. In this example, her split-leg turn is followed by a pause as the man sandwithed her, she then collected her leg and did a delicious curtsy, all executed flawlessly.

Barrida (0:33-0:36, 1:32-1:37)
The girl stepped forward with her right leg (or in the second case stepped back with her left leg) to allow the man to do a barrida - sweeping her right leg to the right with his right leg. She followed by collecting her left leg until it touched his right foot, then crossing over to land on the other side of his foot. Barrida is generally an unobtrusive move, but her execution left an impression on me, mainly due to her control over the speed of the movement.

Ocho in slow motion (0:36-0:41)
Here the girl did an ocho at a deliberately slower pace. She knows how to dance fast, but she chooses to do some moves in slow motion, showing very good judgment. Most adult dancers don't care if they actually draw an 8 on the floor when they do ocho, but this girl did just that carefully, making her ocho particularly beautiful.

Planeo (0:43-0:45)
This is another elegant planeo, also executed in slow motion. Adult dancers tend to exaggerate their movements, such as lowering the knee to create a larger planeo that is close to the ground. But this girl's movements all look natural, without exaggeration, and the result is better, in my opinion, with more natural and innocent beauty.

Moving backwards with front ocho (1:40-1:45)
Here is another example she drew 8 at a slower pace, this time using greater hip rotation, so that she could move backward while doing front ocho. Most adult dancers turn too hastily, so their ocho lacks the beauty it deserves. But this girl is particularly good at using slow motion to show the grace of her movements, espcially when involving rotation like ocho and planeo, demonstrating excellent musicality, control and aesthetic sense.

Sandwich (2:10-2:19)
Another sandwich in slow motion with a captivating deep knee flexion.

Overall, I was very impressed by this little girl's sophistication, or rather, her talent. I hope that adult dancers can learn the ease with which she dances, in particular, learn to slow down the pace when doing turns, pivots, ochos, and planeos, because, as this little girl demonstrated, that will add grace to the dance. This means that leaders also need to slow down the pace to allow women to infuse elegance to their performance.